Oh man. I am so tired and feeling so badly. I thought I was doing better, and then my parents came with all kinds of crap food and I ate some, like a moron. Now I feel so utterly horrible. Exhausted, my throat aches, my chest aches, my stomach throbs, even my eyes are burning. All this from some “peanut brittle popcorn,” and squash ravioli. My last test showed nothing of significance, just once again a slight “shadow” on my gallbladder that no one would notice if I weren’t complaining of issues. I suppose I will call the doctor with this new experience and see what he has to say. Hopefully the’ll give me a referral somewhere where I’m likely to get some answers.

Here’s a question for me. How come, even when I tell my mother I can’t eat this kind of stuff, does she continually press it on me? “Oh just a little bit won’t hurt you.” News flash: Yes it will. But the even bigger question is, why the hell can’t I just not eat it? And then why while I’m miserable does she have to suggest that everyone has such problems and it’s all about aging?

I could seriously whine all day and night about the issues I’ve had struggling with my mom’s insistence that we deny all problems always. But I don’t think it would help.